When Kel and I first started talking about having kids, and we decided that I would be the baby oven, without any thought or actually any discussion, I told her that any kids we have would have her last name. I just wanted this. It sucks that our children can not be our biological children. And we live in a state that second parent adoption is not an option. So I felt that the best thing for us to do for everyone to see them as hers was for them to have her last name. And I have said all along that the day she decides to marry me - to make me an honest woman! haha - that I will take her name also. But I have really been considering going ahead and legally changing my name also - even without Kel marrying me first. (although, she may think she is getting off easy if I do, but babe, you aren't - you will marry me someday, and I do mean someday soon!! haha I love you sweetheart!)
So, what have you done? Have you taken your partners name? Did your partner take yours? Or have you both kept your own names? What about your kids? What name did you give them? And why?
(we will discuss marriage in an upcoming blog)
8 comments:
Im not sure if this counts but my husband changed his last name to mine leagally so my son wouldnt have a different name.. I was never married before so I had him call my dad and ask and of course he was happy about it seeing Justinn was the last boy to keep the name going....I cant wait till you get married :)
Good post! I changed my last name before AJ was born to K's last name. Hers was much easier and better than mine. So therefore when I had AJ we all three had the same last name! 2nd parent adoption is legal in our state which I am very thankful for.. but I also wanted us ALL to have the same last name. I just thought for school purposes, confusion, etc it made it easier. We have a great attorney that made it very simple and very little hassle at all for us. Obviously our baby number 2 that is on the way will have the same last name too!
And I can't wait until the marriage thing is legal too!
Let me know if you have anymore questions on the last name change thing. I know every state is different but would be glad to answer any questions you had! Are you on FB by the way?
Well you know me enough to know that it's all about me :) So the kids all have my last name. J is going to change her last name to mine when her mom dies (that was the plan) I think it will happen sooner than later now with Syd in school.
We would all change our names to park...but it's less expensive if just J does it.
(do you see how I did that :) ha ha ha...I'm ALWAYS thinking)
Yes Tina - that does count! My question was geared to same sex couples, because generally a woman takes the mans name. But this was the kind of answer that I was looking for. And I think it is wonderful that your husband did that!
Marcy, I am on FB - I don't get on there that much, exspecially since I am trying to do this blog a day thing! haha Can't commit to too much or I lose focus!
KJ - yep, I do know you well enough! haha And of course, it would be WAY too much for all of you to change your name, so much easier for J to change hers! :o)
Thanks for all your responses!!
I have two stories- so my ex and I took letters from both our names and made up a name- her last name was Gomez and mine was Marteney so we took the last three from each name and came up with Mezney- sounds like a real name and we changed our names- I had two kids while I was with her and they were born Mezney's- then enter Jen- when we were married I took her last name- it was hard for me because I did not want a last name different from 2 of the kids- My oldest did not want to change his last name but Toby did-so I have 1 child with a different last name then the rest of us- it still bothers me- but it is what it is. My ex still has that last name.
I know you geared this towards same sex couples but wanted to inject my two cents for what it is worth. When my husband and I got married I decided to keep my name, well when we got pregnant at first he was good with the child having my name then when he got closer to dying he asked me to hyphenate the child's name as he knew how much my name meant to me. I did and decided then that since my child had X name so would I, so I took his name and hyphenated it with mine.
When I was pregnant I told Dawn that I wanted Maddie to have her last name for the same reasons you mentioned...Wanting to give her that connection since she doesn't have the biological tie. Then I started thinking that I didn't want to be left out with the only different name so I told her I wanted to take her name too. I'm so happy we all have the same name.
We hyphenated our last names for the kids and I've always wanted to change mine to match, but the expense and the hassle, not to mention the frustration that we can't simply get married and voila! name is changed. I still plan on doing this someday, as I'd really like to share my children's last name with them.
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