TTC

So - our DHL delivery finally showed up on Monday. Four days late, I must add. We were certain that things were all screwed up, and that we missed my peak, and that this cycle was a bust, and we were out $169 for shipping. But - we didn't give up, I kept testing, and then, finally, on Wed, CD 16 - I got my peak. I will have to say that I was extremely relieved that it finally came.

We did the first insem at around 10:30 - 11:00 am, and the second one around 10:00 pm. We have to work things out so that we can do it when Gryfinn is napping. So Kelly kept him awake longer in the morning, and I made sure that all three boys were in bed for the evening insem. Both insems went good, without any mishaps. Which is wonderful, cause we have definitely had our fair share of mishaps.

Now the wait begins.

We are now 6 dpo, cd 22. Nothing to really report. I had heartburn yesterday, which is nothing new, and I was extremely tired. But, I think that was due to going out Saturday night for my best friends bachelorette party. Kel and I didn't get home until 3am - and probably not to sleep until closer to 4. And I woke up at 8. Jarrod and Jayk were with their other parents, and my Mom stayed here with Gryfinn. I heard them up and moving around, and then couldn't go back to sleep. So I went ahead and got up. So, I think the fatigue was just my body telling me that I had some catching up to do on my sleep. I also had a lil bit of cramping - but then I wonder if that is just all in my head. Or if it could be the fact that I usually start my period on cd 26 or 27. I wonder how that will all work out this time. You would think that since I ovulated late, 2-3 days late, that I would also start 2-3 days late. Hmmm? That is just something else for me to ponder about.

No change in my breasts - I of course exam them daily. Waiting to see some sort of change. More blue veins, for my areola to change in size or color - something. Reading this, one who has never been through this roller coaster of ttc, would probably think that I am crazy - or obsessed with my own breasts. But those who have been there - probably thought 'been there, done that'!

This is the difficult part - the waiting. Cause you just don't know what the outcome will be. You want to be pregnant soo bad, with every fiber of your being. And due to that, I think you feel things, see things that aren't really there. Twinges, cramps, heartburn, hmm, are my nipples a lil darker? Those all become - I wonder if that is a sign? So then you look on the internet for early pregnancy symptoms. Even though that you already know that those are all signs. It is like you do that to reassure yourself that this could be it. But in all actuality - there is no way to really know until you get that positive hpt. With our miscarriage and with Gryfinn, I felt it inside, but didn't really know that it was real until it was confirmed by that wonderful BFP! I wish that there was some way to know NOW. To look inside and be like - Yep, look, there is the fertilized egg traveling through my fallopian tube. That would be awesome. But, we aren't so lucky. We have to wait. Wait for either the doom of blood, or the glory of the test! I, like the rest that are ttc, pray for the glory.

Another question during the ttw to ask - is when to start testing. I have heard of so many getting positive hpt's as early as 8 or 9 dpo. That would be awesome, but I feel like we have already wasted so much money on pregnancy tests over the last 2 failed cycles. So - do we wait until my period is late - which will be when? After 27 days, or would it be 30? Or should we give in, and maybe start testing at 10dpo? I guess this is just something else for me to ponder....